Thanksgiving 2008.
This year I did not go back East to spend Thanksgiving with my brother and his family. And neither did they come here.
This year I spent Thanksgiving with local friends instead of family. It was an unusual approach to what is for me the ultimate family holiday, but given my present set of circumstances, I am eternally thankful, and grateful, for my friends.
As many of you know, this past February I went to the emergency room because I wasn't able to catch my breath in the frigid outside air. I spent two days in the hospital having every test under the sun performed on me, the end result being there is absolutely nothing wrong with my lungs; I apparently inhaled a blast of cold air that caused me to not be able to catch my breath.
While in the hospital the doctors discovered I have very low levels of the "good cholesterol", which is even more dangerous than having high levels of "bad cholesterol". I spoke with a dietitian during my stay who gave me an appropriate diet to follow, and I was prescribed medication to work in conjunction with the diet. And of course, I was told to work harder at maintaining a healthy weight. Sometimes I forget to eat a meal, and well, you can guess what happens next.
I came home from the hospital exhausted and feeling lousy. I tried to call my brother, but he did not return my calls. After two weeks of calling him and his wife, I finally got my brother on the phone.
Long story short, in the third quarter of 2007 my sister-in-law forged my name on a power of attorney (she had been my accountant for many years), and liquidated, then lost, 80% of my net worth. My brother discovered what she did right after I left him the first message about being in the hospial; he told her about my hospitalization and she confessed everything. We are now in litigation over the matter, which breaks my heart, but it has to be.
My nieces and nephews know what happened, but the majority of them are, naturally, siding with their parents in this matter. They no longer speak to me because I am taking their parents to court. I hope in time that will change.
Over the past nine months my health has been on a roller coaster.
I had a difficult time adjusting to medications, so I've gone through at at least a dozen different kinds. If a medication has a side effect, I develop it.
But the worst is that I was given the wrong dosages, and had my kidneys affected because of the medical mistakes.
As I mentioned earlier, I felt awful much of the time. I would call the prescribing physician's office with my symptoms, and I was not taken seriously. I was told it was either the result of not getting enough rest, or anxiety. Or lack or exercise. I never once got to the doctor; his nurse fielded all the calls and told me she spoke with the doctor about the matter.
Lack of rest I could believe, as I have had insomnia off and on for many years.
Lack of exercise, ok, I could accept that reason.
But anxiety? I am not an anxious person.
Finally, after a slew of calls and a visit to see the doctor which resulted in a thorough blood test, it was discovered I had a life threatening level of potassium which in turn affected my kidney function. I am now seeing a nephrologist, who put me on something akin to "kidney rehab", which means I have to eliminate all sodium, watch my protein intake, and stay away from all dairy until my kidneys completely heal, which, Thank God, they will.
And yet, through all the family and health dramas, through all the pain, I have been uplifted and maintained by my friendships. A day never went by that someone didn't call me to see how I was doing, or to offer help or advice. I never felt so alone, yet paradoxically, at the same time, I never felt so loved.
Losing one's family is heartbreaking. It is a pain unlike any other. And having your health jeopardized is frightening. But through all the drama, I learned a very valuable lesson.
I learned I am not what I possess, but what I know. And what I know is this: I am much loved.
This year I spent Thanksgiving with local friends instead of family. It was an unusual approach to what is for me the ultimate family holiday, but given my present set of circumstances, I am eternally thankful, and grateful, for my friends.
As many of you know, this past February I went to the emergency room because I wasn't able to catch my breath in the frigid outside air. I spent two days in the hospital having every test under the sun performed on me, the end result being there is absolutely nothing wrong with my lungs; I apparently inhaled a blast of cold air that caused me to not be able to catch my breath.
While in the hospital the doctors discovered I have very low levels of the "good cholesterol", which is even more dangerous than having high levels of "bad cholesterol". I spoke with a dietitian during my stay who gave me an appropriate diet to follow, and I was prescribed medication to work in conjunction with the diet. And of course, I was told to work harder at maintaining a healthy weight. Sometimes I forget to eat a meal, and well, you can guess what happens next.
I came home from the hospital exhausted and feeling lousy. I tried to call my brother, but he did not return my calls. After two weeks of calling him and his wife, I finally got my brother on the phone.
Long story short, in the third quarter of 2007 my sister-in-law forged my name on a power of attorney (she had been my accountant for many years), and liquidated, then lost, 80% of my net worth. My brother discovered what she did right after I left him the first message about being in the hospial; he told her about my hospitalization and she confessed everything. We are now in litigation over the matter, which breaks my heart, but it has to be.
My nieces and nephews know what happened, but the majority of them are, naturally, siding with their parents in this matter. They no longer speak to me because I am taking their parents to court. I hope in time that will change.
Over the past nine months my health has been on a roller coaster.
I had a difficult time adjusting to medications, so I've gone through at at least a dozen different kinds. If a medication has a side effect, I develop it.
But the worst is that I was given the wrong dosages, and had my kidneys affected because of the medical mistakes.
As I mentioned earlier, I felt awful much of the time. I would call the prescribing physician's office with my symptoms, and I was not taken seriously. I was told it was either the result of not getting enough rest, or anxiety. Or lack or exercise. I never once got to the doctor; his nurse fielded all the calls and told me she spoke with the doctor about the matter.
Lack of rest I could believe, as I have had insomnia off and on for many years.
Lack of exercise, ok, I could accept that reason.
But anxiety? I am not an anxious person.
Finally, after a slew of calls and a visit to see the doctor which resulted in a thorough blood test, it was discovered I had a life threatening level of potassium which in turn affected my kidney function. I am now seeing a nephrologist, who put me on something akin to "kidney rehab", which means I have to eliminate all sodium, watch my protein intake, and stay away from all dairy until my kidneys completely heal, which, Thank God, they will.
And yet, through all the family and health dramas, through all the pain, I have been uplifted and maintained by my friendships. A day never went by that someone didn't call me to see how I was doing, or to offer help or advice. I never felt so alone, yet paradoxically, at the same time, I never felt so loved.
Losing one's family is heartbreaking. It is a pain unlike any other. And having your health jeopardized is frightening. But through all the drama, I learned a very valuable lesson.
I learned I am not what I possess, but what I know. And what I know is this: I am much loved.
Posted by Pamela Wellesley at 11/28/2008 11:59 AM 
Categories: Thanksgiving 2008,family.,friends,gratitude
Categories: Thanksgiving 2008,family.,friends,gratitude
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